Thursday, March 25, 2010

Weddings

Sorry I haven’t posted in a while. I’ve been really busy with teaching and projects, but now things are slowing down. I have one more big project this weekend, and then there’s pretty much 4-6 weeks of no school for the Khmer New Year (April 14-16). Yes, a three day holiday requires that much time off from school.

Another thing I’ve been busy with is Khmer weddings because it’s wedding season. Wedding season is in the dry season so that they don’t have to worry about rain. I’ll give you a rundown of my co-teacher Sopheap’s weddings.

Sopheap and his fiancee been engaged for almost a year, but they had to wait until wedding season and he had to save up for the dowry. Khmer weddings are a combination of independent courtship and family approval and arrangement. I believe Sopheap met his wife on his own, but their families knew each other.

A few weeks before the wedding, the couple and their relatives give invitations to their friends. But, there is no need to rsvp, just come or don’t come.

Khmer people like going to weddings, but usually money determines if they go. Instead of giving gifts, Khmer people put cash in the invitation envelope and then they have to go to a table where they record how much they give. So, poorer families may have trouble going to all the weddings that they are invited to.

Some Peace Corps Volunteers are bothered by weddings because Khmer people only invite them because they think foreigners have a lot of money. I am lucky that the people who invite me to weddings just want me to be happy there and don’t want me to give money. I always try to give the standard amount, but my Khmer friends always try to drag me away from the table before I can give the money.

Weddings are usually one day, but can sometimes be more. Sopheap’s wedding was one day. Most guests don’t arrive until the evening. The morning involves a lot of pictures and kneeling. During the whole ceremony, the bride and groom change clothes a lot. Here is them in one of their outfits:
From sopheap's wedding


This wedding was particularly fun because a few other Peace Corps Volunteers came and they decided to get traditional Khmer make-up. I thought they looked goofy, but all the Khmer people thought they looked very pretty. The three girls on the right are wearing traditional Khmer make-up:
From sopheap's wedding


When you arrive at a wedding, you are given a seat and have to wait for everyone to be seated at your table before you are given food and drinks. So, it’s good to arrive with your friends.

Here is me with the vice-school director and one of my other co-teachers, Solen (right):
From sopheap's wedding


Here is me with Solen and a biology teacher:
From sopheap's wedding


The food is always really good at weddings and usually involves a few courses. Some wedding tables are tamer than others, but most of the weddings I’ve been at involve a lot of drinking.
From sopheap's wedding


The groom doesn’t drink much, but sometimes he cheers with guests, or the vice school director forces him to drink.
From sopheap's wedding


Then people start dancing. Khmer dancing is mostly a lot of slow, semi-graceful arm-waving and twisting. Men dance with men and women dance with women. For me, it involves a lot of drunk Khmer guys grabbing me and dragging me to the dance floor. Luckily, there is no touching involved in the actual dancing.
From sopheap's wedding


From sopheap's wedding


Weddings sometimes go until about 3am and keep all the neighbors from sleeping, but I left this one a little earlier. Now wedding season is ending and Khmer New Year season is beginning and April looks to be quite hot. I don't think I can write a blog-post about Cambodia without finding somewhere to comment on the heat and April is supposedly the hottest month. Wish me luck.